A few months ago, I came across a video interview with Dr. Gabor Maté that discussed attachment, authenticity, and the interplay between the two for children specifically. The content struck me in its simplicity. Maté explained two often complex topics in a way that seemed digestible. The idea is that as children we have two core needs (in addition to several others), one for attachment and one for authenticity.
At Evoke, parent support is taken seriously. As one of Evoke’s Parent Coordinators, I spend a large part of my time talking with parents and family members whose kids are currently in our program. I can answer their questions about the program, help them navigate the Parent Portal, and I can also let them know about the different support options that are available while their child is with us.
I was just 14 years old when I took my first job in Food and Beverage, slinging fries at the local McDonalds. It was the only place in town that would hire someone so young and, obviously, it wasn’t glamorous: I left each shift covered with a fine mist of stinking fry oil that only exacerbated my teenage acne. But I stuck with it because I liked the way the team worked together, like gears in a clock, to kick out order after order when our dining room was full. I especially enjoyed the shrill, thrilled squeals of kids when they opened up their Happy Meal to find a Power Ranger or Space Jam toy. I’m guilty of sneaking an extra toy to a kid or two during my time there. Sorry, boss.
Election day is just around the corner. September 22nd was National Voter Registration day, and a great reminder for all citizens of the United States to take a little time in their day to ensure their voter registration. Since our staff and clients have a harder time accessing the internet, the seamless process of voter registration, or at least confirming that they are registered, is a more tedious task for our wilderness folks.
The meaning that we ascribe to elements in our lives and experiences is powerful. Over half a century ago, Albert Ellis created an entire theory, Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy, discussing how we, as humans, ascribe meaning to an experience; that the way that we interpret it will give rise to the emotions we hold about it.
“Would you like me to walk you to your car?” my daughter suggested, as my husband and I stood in her new dorm bedroom. We had been there awhile lugging boxes in, and inspecting the place that was now her Home.
She was ready for us to leave. Ready to step into adulthood.
Years ago, my child had begun to walk—well, let’s be honest here—run down a path that felt destined to lead to terrible things. She was barely a teen and already experimenting with drinking and substances, showing formidable defiance, beginning to fail out of school, and running a very unpleasant show in two households. Like so many who get pulled into the whirlpool of parenting an out-of-control child, my ex-husband and I were terrified and completely out of our depth.
Just above my home, about a 9-iron away, is access to a trailhead for a smooth 10-mile stretch that runs along the base of the beautiful Wasatch mountains overlooking the valley. This relatively flat bike path is a perfect round trip distance for my level of expertise. I take this ride about two days a week on average, both for the exercise and to soak up the majestic views. I feel free, unencumbered, and for about an hour I have an opportunity for quiet and peaceful reflection.
It has taken some time for Evoke to make a formal statement regarding the racial injustices in our country. Theses injustices have always been here, and the recent footage of the abuse and murders of people of color along with the systemic oppression laid bare by the Black Lives Matter movement—lack of basic healthcare, higher infant mortality rates, stunted access to housing and jobs, dramatically higher rates of incarceration—have led our nation, and Evoke itself, to an inescapable reckoning.
Like the first day of school, the first day at Evoke can be exciting, scary, and full of unknowns. This snapshot into the day will hopefully help shed some light on the process. The saying goes: “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” This concept of gradual steps is the key focus of Day One.