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Viewing entries tagged with 'books by dr. reedy'

Why You SHOULD Be Your Child’s Friend

Posted by Brad Reedy, Ph.D., Owner, Clinical Director of Evoke Therapy Programs on January 23, 2018 | 5 comment(s)

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Why the Adage to be a Parent not Your Child’s Friend is Actually Flawed

I often hear parents or parent educators utter the adage, “You should be a parent, not a friend, to your child”. I think this goes largely unchallenged in our culture. And the current ubiquitous criticism of parents as helicopter-parents or snowplow parents describes a parent who spends every ounce of their energy to remove discomfort and struggle from the child’s life and wants the child to approve of them. I believe there is a problem with this blanket criticism and the problem may start with our understanding of what it means to be a friend and only partly to do with our understanding of the role of a parent.

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The Hopes and Intentions Letter: Evoking with Compassion

Posted by Brad Reedy, Ph.D., Owner & Clinical Director at Evoke Therapy Programs on May 23, 2017 | 1 comment(s)

Evoke Brad Headshot 3 of 3It has been over twenty-two years since I first began working as a wilderness therapist. While the spirit and dedication of practitioners remains the foundation for quality wilderness-based therapy, many things have changed in that time: family support services, clinical sophistication, whole health curriculum, and a dedication to outcome research. Twenty years ago, when we began on our own adventure to establish the new standard in wilderness therapy, we knew that many would follow suit. We often stated, what makes our program great is not what we did yesterday, but what we are willing to imagine for tomorrow. At Evoke, one of our founding principles is our commitment to continually innovate where we see a need.

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How Can I be Helpful? Reflecting on the Messages from FITS 2017

Posted by Brad Reedy, Ph.D., Owner & Clinical Director of Evoke Therapy Programs on April 28, 2017 | 0 comment(s)

Evoke Brad Headshot 3 of 3I have spent this week reflecting on the messages from the 2017 Forum for Innovative Treatment Solutions’ [FITS] Keynote Speakers. Dr. Nim Tottenham shared her research on attachment and the impact on brain circuitry. Dr. Gabor Maté followed with an illuminating message about how fractured attachments are at the root of many mental health and addictive disorders. Dr. Maté challenged the audience, sharing observations from his practice and life, suggesting that the only important variable we ought to study is the stress (trauma) on our clients—genetics taking a back seat or maybe being kicked out of the car altogether in the pursuit of understanding that the root cause of addiction and mental health is the events in a person’s life and the pain and turmoil where they originate. Addiction, he explained, is not the problem. It is the addict’s attempted solution to the problem. Lastly, Dr. Jami Gill reviewed attachment theory and encouraged therapists by suggesting that we have the capacity to repair attachment trauma by providing a safe container (or context) for others. That safe context, she explained, was the mind of the therapist, consultant, friend, or parent, and their capacity to listen and really hear the one with the attachment trauma.

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How a Parent's Limitations Impact Children

Posted by Brad Reedy, Owner & Clinical Director at Evoke Therapy Programs on February 22, 2017 | 3 comment(s)

Evoke Brad Headshot 3 of 3I was once asked “How long does it take to understand the kind of childhood one has endured?” While this understanding comes at a different pace and with more or less clarity at times, one can hear the messages of a childhood by learning to hear our inner voices. The dialogue of self doubt; the justifications; the apologies; the “I hope you don’t think I am whining…” –all these offer glimpses into the spoken and unspoken messages of one’s childhood. The sometimes critical inner-voice can be recognized not just by listening to the negative thoughts, but also by listening to the qualifying comments. “I know this may sound selfish, but…” or “I don’t want this to seem…”

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